Best stripper songs to give a lap dance too

A stripper song is a piece of music which is either instantly associated with the art of lap-dancing, or has so many booty shaking references in it's lyrics/music video/ title - or a combination of all three.  They may not be the sexiest songs, sound wise, but they will make you take your clothes off.

The classic stripper song is naturally this brass-filled joy from David Rose in 1957;



However, in reality, this is often played at the end of the night as the final song, or perhaps as the backing music when a promotional offer is on.  I've given out branded items, such as DVD's or baseball caps, in the past, to scores of lucky guys.  If the stripclub offers a stag party stage show, this is the tune that they'll play as the poor man gets dragged up on stage to be whipped, pummelled and humiliated by several blood-thirty strippers.  It's the official Spearmint Rhino song for promos and stag parties, but the next song is famed for being Peter Stringfellow's free dance tune of choice;



If you venture into Stringfellows around midnight and this baby from Motley Crue starts up, grab a seat quick - it's topless teaser time!  The video is filled with gyrating exotic dancers on poles, the lyrics and title "Girls, Girls, Girls", are pretty self explanatory, and so simple that even the most drunken hillbilly can sing along to them.  It's also a short song, at barely over four minutes, which is great news for a strip club, as the average stripclub DJ will try and keep songs around the three and a half to four (ish) mark if possible.  Thats why that twenty pound went so quickly guys!!!

This song took over stripclubs all over the world when it came out a few years back.  "My girlfriend is a dancer - Titty dancer" by Dan Diamond - a punchy house music tune with a beat to grind to. It was the exotic dancers Marmite - you either loved it or hated it.  The lyrics rang true - we lie, we go on stage like a porn star, we count our money when we are on the phone - but giving head frequently? We don't do that in VIP!  Or do we.....?



If you hear this song come on whilst you are in a gentleman's club, take a look at the surrounding lapdancer's faces - some will be pulling faces, suddenly coming over like affronted feminists.  Others will be laughing and singing along like demented teenagers, banging their heels in time to the beat and jiggling their own big titties to the chorus line of "she's a dancer...a titty dancer".

A more heartfelt song of yearning for a lapdancer is T-Pain's "I'm in love with a stripper".  If the girls are having a bad night, this is a great song to hear, as it makes a woman feel really good - it goes on about how beautiful she is, her fantastic 'popping and locking skillz' (that's dancing skills sweethearts if you are from this side of the pond), and of course, it's a LOVE SONG FOR A STRIPPER.  Thereby proving that love is possible even for women who display themselves for money in the more vanilla side of the sex industry.



To finish off - geddit!?! "You can leave your hat on" by Joe Cocker.  Actually, this would make a great song to start a routine too, as everyone finds it funny after it was used in that miners movie, "The Full Monty".


Well that's my list of stripper themed songs to give a lapdance too.  As regular readers will have noted, I've attempted to put the accompanying you tube videos on this post.  This is my first try in two years of writing this blog, so if they don't work, please tell me and I'm deeply sorry.  If you really want to hear them, start frequenting stripclubs more often - they'll get played, I promise.  Another post is planned for great songs to strip too - I've got a few dancing favourites, what are yours?

Check out this post for great songs to give a lapdance or stageshow to....

Are Strippers Self-Employed? Landmark Court Case

Stripping has been in the news again this week, with more publicity highlighting that its not always a glamorous and rosy picture after all.  A former stripper is in the process of suing Stringfellows after she was 'unfairly dismissed'.  According to reports if she wins it could set a legal precedent for dancers in the adult entertainment industry, and give the dancing girls of Britain legal rights.  Our rights as lapdancers are pretty murky, even though the obligations that we have to the club are set in stone, and we are often fined, suspended or sacked if we break them.
The Guardian did a great piece on the case in their legal section, find it here.  If you prefer a more sensationalist tabloid view, the Daily Mail wrote about it here and the Sun here.
At the moment lapdancing is pretty one sided - heavily weighted in the clubs favour.  There will always be more girls willing to take a dancers place after all, especially in these desperate times.  A girl can be here today, gone tomorrow, even if she has been at the club for 6 months - even 6 years!  It's a real pack your bags and F**k off mentality, and whilst some clubs operate a three strikes and your out system, with a written record of any misdemeanours, quite often its a case of bullying, personality clashes and a show of power.
If she wins, the Guardian's legal affairs correspondant says that we could get the same legal rights as other employees.  I'm a bit unsure what else it could mean for us lapdancers as, unsurprisingly, all the articles focus on the kind of questions I get endlessly asked myself - How much did she earn, what was her biggest night, who did she dance for, did she get naked etc. 
But I'm going to keep an eye on this breaking news story because if she wins, I know by experience that it will probably result in two things; all the dancers will be called in for a house meeting, compulsory attendance or get fined (I've had to pay £50 before!), and the management will probably use it as an excuse to deduct more from our wages, ie: if you miss a shift you will get fined, house fee price will rise, some glorified bouncer with nil team management skills will devise a new shift/fine system with out consulting any lapdancers to see what would work.  You may read this and think I'm complaining, but I'm not - generally speaking exotic dancers get treated by the management and clubs the same way motorists often are - as cash cows, with a myriad range of deductions and heavy penalties levied on them.  So I'll be watching this, and will make space in my diary for the inevitable meeting and deductions to follow....

stripping for squaddies & war vets

Eleventh day of the Eleventh month in the Eleventh year of the Second Millennium

It's Rememberance Day today

I've been giving lapdances to lots of injured soldiers this week as London has been full of war veteran memorial dinners and parties.  Most stripclubs are 'squaddie friendly' - they will let men in a uniform in for free, particuarly those who were hurt in battle.  More than I can say for many of the drinking dens in London - shame on you for not letting them in to let off steam!

I always give a little extra to the war veterans, whether I spend more time than usual talking to them, am even more upbeat and flirty than usual, or give them 2 for 1 lapdances.  Basically I give a shit when they meet me as an exotic dancer. And they look really hot in their uniforms!

This week I've done lots of dances and its been really hard for me.  last night I cried all the way home - I just had to release after acting so happy and upbeat on the outside but inside I was thinking - 'your legs been blown off! You have badly burnt hands!' Poor sods.

So today, I remember you guys - and remember, I'm always happy to take my clothes off for my country!

Doppelganger Stripper

I met my doppelganger last night.  She was a girl I hadn't spoken to before, but we got talking to a customer at the bar together, and over the course of the three-way conversation I knew straight away that we had a lot in common.

Some dancer's are like chalk and cheese, but the two of us were eerily similar - blonde, English, educated.  We both had long blonde hair, styled with a slight curl.  We were both wearing 50's style make-up last night - a smear of bright red lippie to set off our pearly whites, a thick flick of eyeliner and long lashes - but not heavy, more seperated and spidery.  It's the kind of make-up I like to wear on the slower nights - it's easy to do, you look beautiful but approachable, and make's a great impact on the older or more classy clientele.

I did notice however that her lashes were real, whilst I wore fakes at the outside corners - this gives a really natural looking effect, and, really really annoyingly, her teeth were far whiter than mine.  My teeth are white, but not that white - in fact they aren't even that white either, now that I'm looking at them in the mirror - getting stoned and drinking lots of red wine over the summer has stained my teeth quite a bit.  Best book up that dental hygenist again....

On the positive side, my tits were better.  So there.  Nobody's perfect, hey?

But don't think that I was silently bitching and scheming about my doppelganger - quite the opposite in fact.  I was really happy to meet a stunner who shared my style, and - big tick in the box here - was also English and could hold a decent conversation on lot's of interesting topics.  So happy in fact that when I saw her later I grabbed her for a double dance with another guy I'd been talking to, which is the ultimate stripper seal of approval.  Nothing say's 'nice to meet you - let's be friends' than a crisp 20 that someone else did the hustling for.  It's like money for free.

Doppelganger and I had a little goodbye chat at the end of the night too, and even checked what shifts we would be sharing next.  It's nice to make new friends in this industry, especially when they are pretty and pleasant!!!

london lapdancing - where have all the nerds gone? To a virtual lapdance?

The lapdancing clubs in london used to be full of nerds.  I loved nerds - they were in awe of us hot young girls, and a nerd lapdance usually promised decent bucks.  Not the hugest paycheque, but they were steady and consistent and kept coming back.  Thats the best thing about nerds - they suffer from limited female interaction, and so when they fall for a lapdancer, they fall in love with her.  And you can depend and rely on their custom, until they fall for the next sexy girls giving lapdances, or even some hot sexy girl on girl lapdance.  But now all the nerds have all disapeared. 
To where though? The virtual world?  Are avatars and computer games getting so realistic that us sweaty strippers just don't cut it anymore?  I googled lapdancing, and came up with loads of geeky virtual strippers - danni's virtual lapdance, a site to watch erica campbells daily lap dance online, some kira reeds virtual lapdance, even an entry which promises a daily free virtual lapdance.  Free!! hmph!!! hot sexy young girls who do a daily lapdance, to the camera, day after day, cutting into my business. How am I meant to compete with a laptop?