Thursday, 28 October 2010


I had my first office to stripclub shift on Monday and boy was it eventful. A big group of americanfootballers came in, I thought they were the miMi dolphins but they turned out to be the San Fran 49ers. Hey, how am I to know the difference? They were all huge tall guys , with dark black skin rippled with muscles. I couldn't stop touching them , their arms, those six packs - definitely not ur average British guy. They had cute accents and funny ballsy american chat up lines and pearly White teeth which shone like beacons in the bright spotlights of my club.
The best BEST bit tho had to be when I got up on stage. Now I hadbeen working my charms on one footballer in particular but hadn't got a penny ,(or dime)outta him yet. But he was a yank, and boy do they love to tip on stAge, so when I heArd the DJ call me up next song I dropped some pretty heavy hints. In fact, my hints couldn't have been more specific; I pointed out the stage i would be performing on, that I would be there for exactly two songs, and I would be very disappointed if he didn't watch and fold a note into hismouth so I could grab it with my teeth tits toes whatever.
He did brilliantly!!!! Strolled over second song and began showering me with five pound notes. Then his mates saw and wanted to join in so they came over and started chucking dance tokens at at me!!
The rest of the night, all of the other dancers were like, sent u the girl who got loads of tips on stage??? I felt so lucky and special. A proper SUPERSTRIPPER

Monday, 25 October 2010

I am currently sitting at my office desk. Under it lies a big leads bag filled with dancer clothes, 6" heels and long lashes. I am petrified my boss will catch me out, see my naughty bits and deduce that I am much more than your average admin assistant....
It's also making me kinda horny....not that I want to screw anyone in this office but I am pretty sure they would screw me given half a chance......OMB my boss crept up and looked over my shoulder as I wrote that. - thank god his eyesight can't read an iPhone from that height. Note to self - don't write about snagging people at work when I actually am at work

Sunday, 24 October 2010

Back to stripping....

Sorry folks that I have been so quiet over the summer. I randomly got given an office job and thought, hell why not grow up and wear a suit?
Well that train of thought has lasted an entire six months and I am itching to get back to being me, sassy by name and sassy by (naked)nature!

Working in an office has had good and bad points:

Good; I am paying proper tax, have developed a 5 day a week work ethic, now super organised, and have a killer line in Thomas pink shirts and pinstripe.

Bad; I mustsa put on half a stone, no time for a daily exfoliation and pampering regime, White skin as I don't bother with fake tan, and I am completely broke - I have never had to budget for a whole month before!

Well guys n gals, you will be glad to hear that I have managed to renegotiate my hours to half days. I had to bullshit some sob story about difficulties at my family restaurant (read- stripcl o)