Thursday, 27 October 2011

That 70's vajazzle show

Like most people, I dream about work every now and then.  Seeing as I work in a stripclub in London, these dreams could seem quite vividly sexually bizarre to the Freudian crowd, or they are just another night at work, done in a surreal dreamlike way????

"The musical intro to that '70s show came on, and I was walking through a wood, beautifully dappled with sunshine and greenery.  I met a large family - kinda like the one from the show, but they were all dressed as woodland hippies. They invited me into tehir hut for something to eat, but before I'd had a bite of the delicious fruits and food on the table, the young middle sister grabbed me in a fit of jealousy, holding a blunt knife to my throat.  I screamed, but the others, seeing that the knife was blunt, figured I couldn't really get hurt and watched to see what happened.  The girl and I began to wrestle, I grabbed her hands and flung her to the floor.  Mid-tustle I remember thinking - "this is very un-like me to be so violent, but it's kinda fun", and a rush of adrenaline ran through me as I had the power and upper hand, now sitting astride the struggling girl.  Having managed to free myself from her grip and the knife, I ran away from the little woodland cottage, running faster as I realised I was by now very late for work.
I reached a Roman temple, which in my dream was my club, and promptly met a lovely smiling litle guy who wanted to go to VIP with me.  The VIP booths were down a maze of corridors, and were done Roman style, with flowing chiffon drapes hanging on the walls, and low banquettes and chaise lounges to sit and dance on.  We did half an hour, laughing talking and giggling about my nakedness.  Then his mate came along with another dancer, and joined our party.  When the half hour was up, we wanted to stay - my guy said it was the best time of his life, but the other man wanted to go and tried convincing his friend to leave with him.  
I looked down, and realied that my glittery vajazzle had slid across my body from all that fighting and dancing, and was now stuck like a sparkly chain motif around the left half of my waist. I looked at the twinkling sparkles on my skin, and woke up" 

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