Tuesday 28 June 2011

Stripping for Stag Parties

Summer's here, and it calls for a different attitude to dancing.  The hustle is now all about working the busy weekends and large groups of stag parties.
Stag parties roam from day out to pub to stripclub to nightclub then back to stripclub in large groups.  For many it will be their first time; first time meeting the grooms dodgy cousins, first time in a stripclub, first time they have worn a novelty T-shirt with a dumb-ass nickname emblazoned across it's back.
Some stag parties take to strip-clubs like a fish to water, but annoyingly for us dancers. many need a lot more persuading.  Do you know how infuriating it is for a stripper to see a group of 20 guys come in, but then for 19 of them to insist that they are only here for the stag and he will be the only one having dances.  WTF? Suddenly, a group of 20 guys who may have danced with 15-25 different girls becomes a group of noisy, jeering idiots who are happy to watch the free stage show and only dance with the lucky few dancers who get the stag.  I'm telling you now, it can make us so angry - but as any hustler worth her salt will tell you, we have ways of persuading you.

a) Wait till you get drunk.  Even better, persuade everyone that shots are de rigeur on a Saturday night bachelor party.
b) Remind those who don't visit lapdancing establishments that this opportunity to have a hot threesome with Itsy and Bitsy won't happen again for a long time.
c) If they are really, really boring - so dull that it beggars belief that they are calling this a party, then hit them in the man-sized jugular of pride.  Tell them that this is a super-dull bachelor party - and jeez, am I an expert as I've seen so many - and that you and the stag will spend the rest of their lives regretting that they did not pull a Charlie Sheen and spend all night with a pair of tits in their face.  Tell them that the stories down the pub will be short and booed down. Tell them that the best man's speech will be politely clapped.  Tell them that the groom will secretly harbour resentment that he was not dressed up on stage as a nun and whipped with his own belt by some leggy Eastern Europeans and got lost in the VIP. Tell them that if they do not join him in these antics it will make him look like a sex-craved greedy bugger and he will feel lost and alienated at a time which is meant to be showing group solidarity.
d) remind them that this is not as bad as 'The Hangover', but, a true wolf-pack doesn't let a member hunt alone.  They are in this good time together, so let's fucking PARTY!

I love dancing for stag parties.  After a week of hustling suits, Essex boys and various smelly men with dodgy accents, a guy in a dress that is up for it turns me on.  Us lap dancers spend ages choosing, tweaking and putting together our best outfits, so it's great to see men getting in on the act too.
My favourite outfits include;

  • Where's Wally
  • Cave man
  • Roman Centurion (I checked under his skirt for underwear - unfortunately he wasn't commando)
  • Guys in drag
  • Identical, brightly coloured T-shirts with matching slogans/nicknames - this is because it makes them easy to spot and dance for different members of the group.
  • A chicken
As the summer goes on I will be writing several more strip club & stag party posts, plus any uber-interesting adventures that I have with them on their last night of freedom.  I love stripping for stag parties, whether it is taking them for a private lapdance or getting them up on stage and abusing them.    So if you have a stag party coming up, remember to dress up and make sure that the whole wolf pack gets down and dirty with us ladies - it's only one night, and what happen's in the strip club, stays in the strip club!!!

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