You would be forgiven for thinking that when a lapdancer has her time of the month that she takes a few days off work - after all, we are getting our pussies out.
Well you'd be wrong.
Getting a period is good for business!
My tits swell up like juicy soft melons. The water bloating just makes my full ass sexier - unlike jeans, tummy rolls can be carried off with aplomb in the right lingerie.
Weirdly, the men seem to sense it - I must be emitting some sort of sexual pheromone, because my takings are always up when I'm on. Other dancers have corroborated this with me so it's not like I'm talking like a weird freak here.
Mood swings happen so often in the stripclub world that they don't seem unusual to my fellow staff.
And what do we do with the string? Tuck it up us, of course, and be sure to check and change regularly!